by Peter Marus

This entire day I've been on auto-pilot. I didn't sleep at all last night. I just had a ton of things on my mind.
Last night, I was chatting with someone that said I was "sweet and polite", and that she found that to be different. I was thinking about this: I'm a minority of the guys out there. I can't treat a woman like garbage like a lot of guys do...it's just not in me. Yet, these are the guys who usually get the chicks. AllI do is respect the woman, and try to be as good as I can be to her. Another thing I've been noticing is that women like guys like me, just that they think when I'm being myself, tht i'm just trying to fool them into dropping theuir guard in order to hurt them in some way, and that's farther from the truth.
Then again, being so nice has gotten me hurt by women as well. I tend to trust them too much, and in the end they are shady and dishonest...something they claim they aren't and don't like guys who are. Yey for some reason, I tend to not learn from it, and keep going on my path. Butlike I said, it's something in me that makes me be so nice and all, and that does get me in trouble...oh well it's my problem.
Also, not to be a broken record, job hunt still sucks, but i continue on. just frustrates me to no end that Igive outmy resume, and get nothing back...it keeps me up at night that I feel like a loser that i'm 26, have no job, and the near future doesn't look good so far.
Eh, I don't know, then again I'm half asleep now, so I'm just rambling on here....thinkI'll end it there and see what I can come up with tomorrow.