by Peter Marus

I am an impact player, and not just because I look like Justin Credible (pro wrestling joke). What I mean is that I have been able to make an impact in many lives, both good and unfortunatly bad.


I was sitting here thinking about all that has happened to me this past year (from my last birthday to this one coming up), and it absolutly blows my mind how many lives I have made an impact in. I think back to when I helped my Aunt and cousins out when my uncle was in the hospital. If it weren't for me, it would have been difficult for them to see my uncle and be with him during the day, and it would have been difficult for my Aunt and cousins to help him when he need it in the hospital. This realization came to me after my uncle passed away, when all my family were always thanking me for what I did, even refered to me as a "saint".


I also was thinking back to the people I have met and lost contact with due to various reasons. Most of these people betrayed me in some form and they are now dead to me, but the time we had together had a tremendous impact on me and how I now live my life.


I just realized what impact a decision I made had on somone and how it made them feel sad. Knowing what I know now, I would have never would have said to this person, especially considering the impact this person has had in my life recently. I hope to payback the kindness and consideration this person has shown me. This person didn't have to do all this, and could have told me to piss off when I told this person something I realized cause much pain and unhappiness. I regret saying what I did to this person, and hope in the future I don't do or say something as dumb as I said.